09
Chase asked himself the same question over and over. Where had it all gone wrong?
Was it the moment he rejected Grace’s feelings? Or was it when he selfishly used her love to fill the emptiness in his heart? Three years of dating, one year of marriage. It was impossible to claim there were no feelings between them. He had been with Grace through her tears, her laughter, and even her most chaotic moments.
Grace was fragile, but to him, she had always worn an innocent, radiant smile.
When Chase had late–night surgeries, Grace would stay up with him, preparing snacks to keep him going. She knew his neck often ached, so she would massage it for him before bed. She was terrified of thunderstorms, and no matter how exhausted Chase was, he would rush home from the hospital to comfort her.
Looking back, Chase realized that she had done so much for him. Yet, he often couldn’t distinguish whether his feelings were love or obligation. Even when he was with Grace, Grace was always in the back of his mind.
At the time, he had convinced himself that his attachment to Grace was simply guilt. But the truth was undeniable, when he was with Grace, he needed to picture Grace in his mind just to continue. It wasn’t love, it was a desperate, hollow attempt to fill the void in his heart.
He had even contemplated giving his life to Grace, but his heart to Grace, believing it would somehow make
amends.
Chase held his wedding ring tightly, his vision blurring with tears.
“Chase, do you truly want to marry me and stay with me forever?” Grace’s voice echoed in his mind, her gentle smile and clear eyes haunting him.
Tears slipped down Chase’s face as he whispered to the empty room, “I do. But, Grace… would you still say yes?”
After the baby was born, Adam found a job in Canada, making it easier for him to stay close and help me.
Seeing him at home, dressed in a white coat one moment and cradling the baby the next, added a softer, more human touch to his usual composed demeanor.
Life was gradually settling into a routine. But I knew I couldn’t keep relying on Adam forever.
Quietly, I started searching for a job as a English language teacher. The pay wasn’t much, but it was enough to get by. I didn’t tell Adam. However, he noticed I had been looking for an apartment.
One evening, after putting the baby to bed, he found me in the kitchen.
He cornered me, his expression unreadable. “Am I not doing enough?” he asked softly, his voice carrying a hint
of pain. “Am I not good enough? Why are you still so distant?”
I froze, taken aback by his question. “Are you feeling okay? I’ll get you some medicine,” I said quickly, trying to
deflect.
Before I could leave, Adam grabbed my hand and pulled me into his arms. His warm breath tickled my ear, making my heart race.
“Don’t you see it yet?” he murmured.
“See what?” I asked, bewildered.
Adam slowly released me, reaching into his pocket to retrieve something–a hairpin.
It looked familiar, though I couldn’t quite place it. Gently, he pinned it in my hair, brushing his fingers against my
cheek.
“Just as beautiful as the day I first saw you, six years ago,” he said with a faint smile.
It was a summer afternoon. After being rejected by Chase again, I had run to the grove, sobbing uncontrollably.
My makeup was a mess, and my emotions had spiraled out of control.
“You’re disturbing my studying. Stop crying,” a voice had said, startling me.
Blinded by frustration, I pushed the stranger to the ground and snapped, “Scum! Why can’t you see me? I’m
beautiful, smart, and capable. Are you even worthy of me?”
The words poured out without restraint, my grief fueling every syllable. I hadn’t even registered the stunned
expression of the boy in front of me.
All I remembered was how I had scolded a seemingly innocent stranger into speechlessness.
The next morning, I woke to find breakfast waiting on the kitchen table. The bedroom and living room were
spotless–Adam’s way of expressing joy.
He had left a note with tiny hearts drawn around it.
[Remember to eat breakfast.]
Sipping my tea, I felt a small, warm smile creep across my face. For the first time in a long while, my tightly
wound emotions began to unravel.
It wasn’t long before Adam proposed. Again, it was a summer afternoon, surrounded by lush greenery. He smiled
as he slipped the ring onto my finger, his gaze steady and full of quiet confidence. There were no questions.
In unison, without hesitation, we both said the words in our hearts. “I do.”
(The End)