Chapter 132
“Dilly?!” I heard my brothers little voice, pulling me from the past and into the present. I turned my body around to see him standing in the doorway to the kitchen. A crayon rested in his right hand but soon hit the floor with a very small sound as he dropped it and ran over to me,
I moved on instinct, and flew my arms out to embrace him, dropping down to my knees so I could hold him closer, tears flowed out of us both as my hand rested on his little head. I held him tight, terrified that if I let him go I’d never get him back. My little brother.
He had grown since we had last laid eyes on each other. He had changed so much except his face remained the same, and his rosy checks were still always holding some form of heated hue which just made him seem all the more adorable.
*Freddie…” I whispered, while holding him as close as what was humanly possible. I never wanted to let go. Maybe I could run away with him, we could get out of here once and for all I just knew we would get caught though, it was better for him to stay as far away from me as possible. “Are you ok?”
Without thinking I made his body pull away from mine and looked at him stood in front of me. My hands went to his cheeks, inspecting him for anything out of the ordinary, and gently wiped away his fallen tears with my thumbs.
“I’m ok.” He wasn’t, he’d changed so much. Before I left he had that beautiful childish innocence to him, because I had sheltered him as much as I could from learning just how bad the world was, but now, I could see him checking over my shoulder, and fear was clouding his eyes, despite the glee he felt at seeing me, he also looked at me the same way strangers did, like I was damaged.
I swear to God I’d be out for blood if I found out he’d been hurt at any point in anyway. Why was he so frightened?
*You’ve stayed out of trouble haven’t you?” I tried to force my tears down, knowing I couldn’t let him see me like that, and sniffed while not taking my eyes off him. I shouldn’t have come to see him, he won’t understand why I’ll need to leave again. “You’ve kept your head down.”
*I’ve been ok, really, Richard has been looking after me.” My eyes widened at the boy in front of me and felt my eyes begin to brim again, god when did I get like this, I never used to cry in front of people, and now here I was doing nothing but. I turned to face Richard, Nicks dad and nodded at him as he too held his tears in. He would never know how grateful I was for him. “Mommy’s gone, isn’t she.”
Nicks dad nodded too in response to my unspoken appreciation while looking at the pair of us with nothing but sympathy and sorrow on his face. I turned back to Freddie and smiled through my tears, I just felt nothing but guilt while looking at him, so instead of reassuring him the way I should have done. Instead of being his shoulder to cry on I broke down right in front of him, I should have been his support but instead he became mine.
“I’m… I’m sorry… I’m so sorry. It’s my fault… I killed her. I killed her and now you’re… you’re…” I shook my head while looking at my little brother. I’d let him down, I swore to my dad that I would protect him and my mont. Instead I had killed my mom and left Freddie alone. I buried my face in my hands and sobbed still on my knees in front of the little boy,
“Dilly…” I shook my head at him calling me by my name I didn’t deserve his love or admiration… I deserved everything the king had done and more, I was to blame, I’d killed our mom, I’d killed our dad, Freddie really did deserve so much better than me. “You are a superhero!” What? “That’s what everyone says, and I know it’s true.”
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